Wednesday, November 11, 2009

I Don't Need To Tell You What You Already Know

I've been sent this by a bunch of different people and I thought it was funny enough to share with everyone. This is from the website Left Take. Please to enjoy . . .

Top Ten Reasons To Make Gay Marriage Illegal

1) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.

2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

3) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

4) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn’t changed at all like many of the principles on which this great country was founded; women are still property, blacks still can’t marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.

5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of marriages like Britney Spears’ 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.

6) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn’t be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren’t full yet, and the world needs more children.

7) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

8) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That’s why we have only one religion in America.

9) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That’s why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.

10) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven’t adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.

When I first read this, I thought someone had bugged my house. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did. Feel free to comment and add your own reasons.


Craig Sorensen said...

Funny, but I just finished watching Milk a few minutes ago.

Loved the list. Spot on!

Thanks for sharing!

Heidi Champa said...

That's funny. I have Milk waiting for me on the TiVo.

Thanks, for stopping by Craig.

Emerald said...

Hahaha — thanks for sharing! I especially like #6.


Heidi Champa said...

Obviously, Emerald, I like that one too. Thanks for checking in!!